Shoe and I spoke at length tonite and an interesting thought appeared: “What is romantic language and how should one deal with it?” It is an interesting question in light of Buddhism. In Japan, monks who marry do not marry individuals they love; they love individuals they marry. In the West, people are obsessed with romantic love. So what is it and does it conflict with the idea of compassion- love everyone no matter who they are. The more I thought about it, the more this idea appeared:

Romantic love is when two individuals decide to share every aspect of their life together- emotions, sex, child rearing experiences, etc. Any two individuals could fall in love with one another (assuming that they accepted the idea of compassion and practiced it). Thus, the Japanese marry and develop the love. Westerners feel that they need to find the perfect person before they can marry. Less compassion exists amongst Westerners. Although any two individuals could love one another, often it is more desireable to find someone with similar interests.

Romantic love is not bad; it is one form of compassion. Regardless, it is very important to avoid attachment in a romantic relationship. Attachment can occur whenever dependence is formed. Expectations and dependence can only aggrevate any relationship and can only shatter love or create unhealthy attachments.

An odd thought for the day…